Good morning!
Welcome to issue 10.
When I read about this week’s subject I knew I had to write about it. Because it’s not every day we get to talk about poo in a semi-serious fashion.
Oops, FTKT is now a monthly newsletter. This isn’t what I originally intended/envisioned but that’s what you get when your three-year-old child only does nine hours at nursery a week, I guess.
My thanks, as always, to Ferry Gouw for this letter’s illustrations.
Until next time!
Your pal,
Katie
THE FROZEN FAECES
The blizzard took Danish explorer Peter Freuchen by surprise. Seeking cover beneath the dog sled, the large Dane expected to emerge once the storm had passed but the blizzard grew and soon his breath was ice.
After thirty hours the sled was frozen solid rendering him trapped. With food rations depleting he did what needed to be done; he froze his own poo and shaped it into a chisel.
With chisel in hand he carved through the solid wall of ice encasing the sled and emerged victorious. It was then that he realised his toes were gangrene and so he did what needed to be done; he smashed his own toes off with a hammer.
But was it really possible, I wondered, to freeze poo and fashion a weapon from it? Luckily someone else tried it so I didn’t have to. Archaeologist Metin Eren shaped his own faecal matter into knives and froze them at -20 degrees Celsius. But despite his best efforts the experiment was a disaster. Though they were kept cold, using them to cut anything was impossible, the knives like “a brown crayon” 1. Poo, it seemed, was best left in the toilet bowl.
Does it matter? Peter Freuchen went on to become a world famous explorer, author, journalist and anthropologist. Though people questioned the authenticity of his poo tool people also loved the story, and with that the myth became legend. I hope I remember this the next time I am trapped beneath ice.
THREE QUESTIONS
Do you believe he really moulded his poop into a tool?
Have you ever frozen something and used it to dig out of somewhere?
And are there any other famous poops out there? Only Mr Hanky springs to mind
https://www.sapiens.org/archaeology/poop-knife-frozen/